I knew it was going to be one of those days when my second drink was a combination of toffee vodka and banana sambuca, banoffee came to mind although the reality was much worse.
I was out with Aardvark and John, Mrs Fox's flatmate. John doesn't have an animal name yet, but after his perfomance yesterday he may receive one soon. It was supposed to be a few quiet beers while watching the football and then home before Mrs Fox finished work. Can't possibly see how it could go wrong, although when I witnessed John dancing with a 60 year old woman in a gay bar while drinking some columbian cocaine spirit I could sense something had gone a rye.
Don't really know what happened after that although I apparently burst through the house door after Mrs Fox got home carrying chocolate bars and cans of fizzy drink. Went to bed soon after, not before drawing on my leg with a permanent marker and being sick in the bedroom bin. John didn't make it home and woke up with a permant marker moustache and soul patch. Not actually sure he's still alive..... might be worth a quick check.
Turns out quiet drinks are the most dangerous!
Fox
Sunday, 20 November 2011
Friday, 18 November 2011
5 Best Zoo Trips Ever
There's been many a Zoo trip throughout the last 8 years, too many to mention. So I figured for the first ever Zoo adventures blog I would run down the top five trips and at the same time introduce some of the animals.
5) Krakow, Poland.
A trip to Poland with Aardvark and Mr Snake featured a removal from a 4 star hotel, a collapsing camp bed in the next hotel and finally 2 rooms in a 5 star hotel.
4) Prague, Czech Republic.
The capital of the Czech republic has been responsible for many a drunken Zoo night however this one featured a can of coke costing the equivilent of £100. Needless to say Wolf wasn't happy to pay it and neither were the bouncers when we ran from the club.
3) Gran Canaria, Canary Islands.
Bug and myself took on an 18-30's holiday just before I got to my best before date and became too old. The drinking was crazy, Bug lost all his money in a "strip club" on the first night, I managed to chip my hip bone in a foam party and there was free porn on the TV all day!
2) Easy Cruise, Europe
Would have been number one up untill september this year. We travelled to Amsterdam, Rotterdam, Antwerp and Brussells and probably didn't manage to sober up the whole time. The zoo keeper became paranoid after smoking too much weed and had to go back to the boat in Amsterdam. I had to go into a sex shop and buy a massive dildo after losing a bet with the Aardvark. Finally Wick the ferret got so drunk in Rottterdam he couldn't get off the boat to experience Antwerp the following day.
1) Las Vegas, Nevada
There's nothing i can say about this place that hasn't been said a million times before, however walking the strip drinking 4loco dressed as a monkey, drinking Skyy vodka by the bottle in nightclubs and firing fully automatic machine guns all helped to make this a special trip. Trying to keep control of Bug, Tiger Woir and Jackdaw was one of the hardest and most enjoyable tasks I have ever attempted and I only had to give one black eye!
Quite simply life will never be the same after this Zoo trip.
Looking to plan the next Zoo trip sometime soon so any ideas would be greatly appreciated.
Fox
5) Krakow, Poland.
A trip to Poland with Aardvark and Mr Snake featured a removal from a 4 star hotel, a collapsing camp bed in the next hotel and finally 2 rooms in a 5 star hotel.
4) Prague, Czech Republic.
The capital of the Czech republic has been responsible for many a drunken Zoo night however this one featured a can of coke costing the equivilent of £100. Needless to say Wolf wasn't happy to pay it and neither were the bouncers when we ran from the club.
3) Gran Canaria, Canary Islands.
Bug and myself took on an 18-30's holiday just before I got to my best before date and became too old. The drinking was crazy, Bug lost all his money in a "strip club" on the first night, I managed to chip my hip bone in a foam party and there was free porn on the TV all day!
2) Easy Cruise, Europe
Would have been number one up untill september this year. We travelled to Amsterdam, Rotterdam, Antwerp and Brussells and probably didn't manage to sober up the whole time. The zoo keeper became paranoid after smoking too much weed and had to go back to the boat in Amsterdam. I had to go into a sex shop and buy a massive dildo after losing a bet with the Aardvark. Finally Wick the ferret got so drunk in Rottterdam he couldn't get off the boat to experience Antwerp the following day.
1) Las Vegas, Nevada
There's nothing i can say about this place that hasn't been said a million times before, however walking the strip drinking 4loco dressed as a monkey, drinking Skyy vodka by the bottle in nightclubs and firing fully automatic machine guns all helped to make this a special trip. Trying to keep control of Bug, Tiger Woir and Jackdaw was one of the hardest and most enjoyable tasks I have ever attempted and I only had to give one black eye!
Looking to plan the next Zoo trip sometime soon so any ideas would be greatly appreciated.
Fox
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